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February 28, 2005
the polysycophantic spree
i get a few hundred emails everyday from nervous future law students asking me, "how do i write a brilliant personal statement?" ("like yours must be" is implied, of course.) flattery, is my answer. and no, i'm not talking about my obvious expertise in self-flattery. below is a bona fide paragraph from my own personal statement, as i describe the evolution of my intellectual interests, all while making a concerted effort to kowtow my audience. take out a pen and paper kiddies—class is in session.
Before my sophomore year in high school began, our family took a cruise of the Caribbean—with math textbooks in tow. Even while docked in tropical paradise, my father dedicated three hours out of each day to teach us differential equations. So when I went off to college, my parents maintained the hope that I would become a great scientist or mathematician; last year, when I told my father that I would attend law school instead, he was a bit shocked. Then, coming to his senses, he said, “Lawyers are scum."
Posted by foxes in personal at 10:38 PM | riffraff (173) | trackback (729)
February 27, 2005
mailbag, 2/27/2005
Foxes,
I need your drivers license #.
Also your w2 was sent home or you have it?
To estimate your 2004 adjusting gross income may be the most difficult part because all that info is at home. dad is looking for the tax forms and will let me know. we'll see how good he can do the job.
You really should have started working on this early.
Mom
Posted by foxes in mailbag at 06:25 PM | riffraff (184) | trackback (1161)
February 26, 2005
it's all about the benjamins
what follows is the oh so enticing introduction of my why penn? optional essay submitted in early november. after reading it i'm sure you'll wonder how the admissions committee has managed to resist the undoubtedly primal and perhaps even sexual imperative of my charm. they must be waiting for a moment when we can be alone. ooooh, that's dirrrrty!
With a question so certain to send applicants ripping apart promotional material to plug into their essay, one wonders exactly how to address such a difficult query without simply regurgitating the same chunks of information undoubtedly prevalent in the works of my peers. At the same time, attempting some artistic re-envisioning of the School's academic merit on paper in hopes of somehow bringing forth the love of unseen eyes seems at best childish and at worse pandering. Instead, I have decided to highlight the two aspects of the University of Pennsylvania Law School that I find appealing in terms of both career development and academic enrichment, enticing me to throw myself upon the mercy of your admissions staff while secretly investigating housing options in the vicinity of campus.
Posted by foxes in personal at 07:21 PM | riffraff (26) | trackback (799)
February 25, 2005
complete @ yale
an international airport??
yale law school writes to let me know that i've gone complete. explicating their unique review process, they write: "the entire faculty is involved in admissions decisions and a file may be read by as many as four faculty readers..." continuing below: "...but your credentials indicate that a single review conducted by Professor Trashcan will be sufficient. Thank you for your admission fee."
Posted by foxes in status update at 10:18 AM | riffraff (325) | trackback (719)
February 24, 2005
held @ chicago
do NOT step into my square.
Posted by foxes in status update at 11:25 PM | riffraff (215) | trackback (786)
February 23, 2005
harvard mon amour
the truth hurts, don't it?
harvard, ever stately, chooses a serif font to break the bad news (unlike stanford: hip, cool, relaxed, and inevitably, sans-serif). however, like their california peers, harvard regrets that they must "deny admission to many candidates whom [they] would like to have at Harvard"—which of course, is a lie, but an effort worth applauding nonetheless.
Posted by foxes in rejections at 03:50 PM | riffraff (166) | trackback (725)
writin' lines knowin' the source will quote it
pre-law blogger taco john takes issue with my lack of capitalization. it writes:
...I found this rant against the LSAT, by foxes, whom I applaud for using something other than Blogger on Blogspot, and whom I think loses a little (ok, significant) credibility for failing to capitalize the first word in any sentence (news flash, grammer is still apperciated).
news flash to taco john: grammar is still spelled with an "a". step down, little piggy; i eat bloggers like you for lunch (with two chimichangas and a pepsi). a word of advice: you shouldn't throw stones if you live in a glass house, and if you got a glass jaw, you should watch your mouf.
Posted by foxes in blogs at 08:39 AM | riffraff (145) | trackback (1246)
February 22, 2005
the whole industry can hate me i blogged my way through
in an effort to convince euphrates to join up with the foxes juggernaut gravy train, i predicted that—because of foxes' irrepressible charm and charisma—the site would blow up "bigger than jesus."
unfortunately, as that forecast has become a reality, life as a public figure has shown its downsides as well—cameras swarming my weekend sex-romps with anna kournikova, gossip raging constantly, paparazzi scaling the walls of my scarface compound. and of course, while i'm heading after my jd, those with their phd's just can't help themselves from chiming in. alec, a qualified player hater, writes on letters of marque:
Her letter was quite weak, but Roxes shouldn't have posted a message that was intended to stay private. After reading through his homepage and the laughs he's getting at the expense of various companies, I question whether he's really Michigan material anyway.
allow me to be serious for a second: if michigan material means brandishing a perpetually stern frown, then pump pump my face full of botox and count me in! getting my laughs at the expense of goldman sachs? is that supposed to elicit sympathy? personally, i think they made their $300 back pretty quickly by whoring me out for peanuts. i'm sure they were laughing at my expense all the way to the bank.
but let me be clear: foxes does not engage in immoral business practices. but when they say, "hey you can have $50 for dinner, $50 for lunch, and $25 for breakfast", then foxes spends $50 for dinner, $50 for lunch, and $25 for breakfast. microsoft trumps all by sweetening the deal. they offer to cover all transportation from redmond to downtown and back, subsidizing a weekend of sightseeing that can include visiting the emp, the space needle, etc. if you don't take advantage of the offer, then you're a fool. i just happen to be the least foolish.
it's about cleaning your plate—read closely little chitlins.
while i would never post the multitude of epic, fawning love letters i receive daily, i barely hesitate to post a letter from a michigan law representative because:
1. a hidden motive of this website is to be informative to my fellow applicants and future applicants. what better way to give a flavor of the application process and a prominent school than straight from the camel's mouth?
2. there is no additional context to the letter. the way the letter is read by you is the same way that letter would be read by me. there's nothing additional to know whose exclusion changes the meaning of the words so as to put the writer in a negative light. simply put: what you see is what you get.
if you think the letter was personal, then you point out the squigglies and heart-dotted i's, because i don't see them. haters, please step off. hmm... i guess i got my swagger back.
Posted by foxes in blogs at 05:48 AM | riffraff (29) | trackback (1197)
February 21, 2005
we can talk but money talks so talk mo' bucks
at the dining table as a kid, my pops always told me to clean my plate. once, when i didn't, he pulled down my pants and spanked me right in front of my family and visiting dignitaries.
accordingly, i fancy that i've set some kind of corporate flyback reimbursement check record. the rap sheet includes: $300 from goldman sachs over two days, $300 from microsoft for a weekend getaway, and $100 from jpmorgan for a one-day romp in nyc. my theory is that those joints want employees that both work hard and play hard—that's why i gnaw on those steaks, nibble on that sushi, ride in those towncars... i'm just a kid from the gutter makin' his butter off these bloodsuckers.
i'm attempting to work my magic with the ut law financial aid office:
I write to thank you for the Tom C. Clark Fellows scholarship offer. I am very interested in attending The University of Texas School of Law.
I would like to attend Prospective Students Day, and I was wondering whether the Law School would be willing to subsidize my visit. I would like to see first-hand the atmosphere of the Law School that I've read so much about.
their reply?
Thank you for accepting your scholarship offer. As for Prospective Student Day concerns you should email them directly at admissions@mail.law.utexas.edu
who accepted what? oopsies.
Posted by foxes in correspondences at 05:48 PM | riffraff (274) | trackback (705)
February 20, 2005
mailbag, 2/20/2005
foxes won't front: he's been doing college-level mathematics since the age of thirteen. by his senior year in high school he had taken upper-level analysis and algebra, gleefully tutoring college seniors after school to help them avoid getting diff-e-screwed.
he's long since abandoned the pervasive loneliness of mathematical research, eschewing deep contemplation for an immersion in the pleasures of the flesh. in sartre's les mains sales, hoederer reproaches hugo by saying, "you don't love men, hugo. you love only principles." for me, it's definitely true; i repudiated mathematics in pursuit of the law for my true love of men—i mean, women.
yet, foxes, ever a man of the people, still keeps in touch with his math buddies. in an effort to convince a boundlessly intelligent compadre to join him in law school, foxes writes:
math is still retarded, i think. okay not retarded. but, i think, we really (we as in the best the world has to offer, us, the smartest/brightest/most aware/biggest hearted/etc) need to engage the world on a more serious level than being a mediocre mathematician can offer. it's too isolated/boring/pointless. know what i'm saying? obviously it's just my opinion.
the top math undergrad at u of o replies:
...but as you said math is pointless. I have to agree with you there. Sometimes at 5 in the morning when I have just finished my analysis homework and have a pile of paper covered with epsilons and deltas which somehow demonstrate the uniform convergence of something or other I can't help but asking myself if there is a point. The answer is invariably that no, there is no point...
Posted by foxes in mailbag at 05:39 PM | riffraff (334) | trackback (782)
February 18, 2005
i'm tired of rumors starting
apparently the michigan law student assigned to me took the lazy way out. instead of calling me, she just dropped me an email. i can't complain, however, with the thirty minute turn around time on her email. in response to my question about michigan law in relation to chicago and texas, she writes:
About Chicago and Texas, clearly I have a bias, but I have the following: Chicago - While Chicago has a great ranking and a great reputation, it is an extremely conservative school. Michigan is extremely liberal. So, depending on your personal political philosophy, that might matter to you. Location-wise, UChicago is in the crappiest (and one of the most dangerous) parts of Chicago, buts its in Chicago (where I'm from - an awesome city). Michigan is in the boon docks (lets be honest), but its a gorgeous little college town thats actually pretty cosmopolitan for a college town. The closest city is Detroit, and no one wants to hang out there. But, you are 45 minutes away from Canada's Windsor, which is a fun little town. Regarding collegiality, I would say Michigan beats Chicago, and any other "top ten" school, hands down. The people here are not psychotic competitive law students. Although this, again, is hearsay, I've heard horror stories about students undermining other students and sabotaging their success at Chicago. I think the best way to tell is go visit and talk to people on campus. Lastly, Chicago puts out more "academics" than Michigan. What I mean is, if you're planning to be a law professor, you might have a better shot at Chicago. On the other hand, I've talked to law firm recruiters in Chicago who say that they would hire a Michigan Law grad over a Chicago grad with higher grades based on the lack of ego and general social capabilities of Michigan grads (ie. not socially inept).
Texas - Don't know anything about the school, but I'll just say that its regional. So, if you're sure (and I mean absolutely sure, b/c there's no going back) that you want to stay in Texas after graduation, it might be a good idea considering the savings in cost. If you want to go somewhere else later, it would be difficult. I would think you'd need to be in the top 10 or 20% in your class to make a Texas J.D. portable to other big cities. Also, keep in mind the recruiting situation. Ask the Texas Law people to send you a list of the firms that came to Texas to recruit. While you're at it, do the same for Chicago and Michigan. The opportunities available through on campus recruiting should not be underestimated. That being said, Texas is probably a hell of a lot warmer than it is here right now.
i'm convinced that every school carries with it generations worth of unfriendly insinuations involving stolen library books, incessant backstabbing, and gladiatorial duels. if such rumors don't exist about your school, then guess what? you guys are starting them.
actually my undergraduate institution also maintains something of a cutthroat reputation, but i found the actual experience quite contrary to such back-fence babble. much to my relief, it turned out that i was the only one who was hiding library books and setting fire to professors' mailboxes. i took those suckers to school. yo shorty, what's really good?
Posted by foxes in correspondences at 07:01 PM | riffraff (25) | trackback (979)
February 17, 2005
a state that's untouchable like elliot ness
dear foxlanders,
can you hear that? it is the sweet siren song of california (no, not the eagles, hotel california, though thematically similar) playing at my ear. you may have guessed it buy now, but i have been accepted to law school in the city where tony bennett left his heart.
this, a day after i received this response from them, concluding a rather quizzical exchange:
Dear ManifestDestiny:
According to my records, a decision letter has been sent to you. Please let us know if you do not receive it in the next couple of weeks.
Thank you for your interest in UC Hastings College of the Law.
--------------------------
Dear Admissions Officer,
I just received a message from the office of admissions telling me that my application is complete. However, my application has been complete, or at least has been listed as complete, on the status checker online since December 9th. I would just to make sure that this email is not indicative of some mistake in the processing of my file. I hope that this will not delay the committee in making their decision or push my application back in the queue. Any information
about this would be much appreciated. Thank you very much.
Sincerely,
ManifestDestiny
QUIT PLAYING GAMES WITH MY HEART!
my email was sent to them two weeks ago, and since then my application status changed to decision online. do they really think they can fool me that easily? do i even care now?
to top it all off, one of the siren's many seductresses phoned me to congratulate me on my acceptance, and to see if i had any questions about the college! how can i resist?
but rumors have been bandied about. word on the street is that the place is downright scary, bullies in the library, hiding books, creating a downright "toxic" atmosphere.
but it's california i say, land of pinot noir, trees as tall as skyscrapers, draped in feathery light.
considering i've been graciously accepted by many other fine institutions, my choice is not one i would wish upon even the most evil of souls. to california or not to california? foxlanders, pity me. more importantly, look into your magic law school bulletin and tell me what you see.
sincerely,
ManifestDestiny
-----------
ManifestDestiny,
as dre would say, "california knows how to party." i met a representative from uc hastings at a law forum i attended and she was cute and charming and fun, and i couldn't help but feign interest in her school amidst hopeless flirting. naturally, i began to fascinate her with my effortless banter, moving seamlessly from discussing ex-governor greg davis to the honorable lance ito. she almost melted.
i imagine droves of such girls, lining the countrysides, thumbs out, ready to hitch a ride. my magic crystal ball says that you won't finder a higher quality of life at any other school. after all, do you want to be dating a homely gal from east pa or a stunner from sf bay? done.
ever since the gold rush, california has been a symbol of hope and possibility, a second lease on life. would the united states have ever reached its potential if it never satisfied its manifest destiny? foxes advises: go forth thee west, young man! capture land that isn't yours! slaughter the natives! slit their throats! spill their blood!!
in the words of jhumpa lahiri, "it's the namesake, stupid." show no fear—fulfill your destiny (and bring back souvenirs).
Posted by foxes in ask foxlanders at 09:30 AM | riffraff (274) | trackback (686)
February 16, 2005
48
why the long face?
ut law sends a small collection of notecards featuring various city landmarks like the state capitol and the clocktower. on the inside, dean powers writes:
Foxes—
We hope to see you at Prospective Students Day on April 7th and 8th.
april 7th and 8th? that's goin' to be one loooong day! high five! ahahaha ehehhee hoho haaa ha ah...
Posted by foxes in correspondences at 05:07 PM | riffraff (275) | trackback (2126)
February 15, 2005
the moore the better
georgetown university law center is holding an admitted student reception on march 2nd at cravath swaine & moore's worldwide office in nyc. i'm thinking about going, if only to see how swainky it gets. after all, i have been cravath some fine hors d'oeuvres! ahahaha ehehhee hoho haaa ha ah...
Posted by foxes in correspondences at 09:26 PM | riffraff (183) | trackback (1045)
February 14, 2005
waitlisted @ columbia
i wanna get down, but not the first night.
columbia said, yes, i uh, might want to be your valentine, if like, i don't have anything else to do. so i did what every other red-blooded male would do—i went to my backup gal.
ut law put out $5k/yr and i didn't even have to buy dinner! ka-ching!
Posted by foxes in waitlists at 05:22 PM | riffraff (345) | trackback (2127)
February 13, 2005
mailbag, 2/13/2005
euphrates writes in to opine on law school admissions, in the process capturing precisely this site's raison d'etre.
Dear Foxes,
I have a golden nugget of advice regarding the law school admissions process, something I learned while a member of Skaxelyi.
Fail with consequence, lose with eloquence and smile.
Sincerely,
Euphrates
Posted by foxes in mailbag at 12:12 AM | riffraff (17) | trackback (1156)
February 12, 2005
the new social norm
exit does not exist (photo: j. becker)
congratulations to all of the february lsat takers! you're off the treadmill now! or, you're just getting back on, the gears are turning, and so much like that post-modern contraption that you're sweating, your legs are moving but you aren't going anywhere. ha ha!
it's absolutely absurd the amount of weight attributed to the lsat in the law school admissions process. i've come to believe that in 95.734% of law school applicants, their admissions chances are more or less determined by a few numbers. in the words of juanquero2,
When law schools say that they look past the numbers at the person, they are spoonfeeding us a giant spoonful of pig shit. I am the embodiment of this undeniable truth.
for the sake of time-saving for all participating parties and the preservation of paper and the treasured forests that material derives itself from, i propose the following process i call, LAW SCHOOL RE-ENGINEERING. basically, the idea is to coalesce all law schools under the umbrella law school called, LAW SCHOOL, of which every other law school can consider itself to be a satellite campus. ie, harvard will now be referred to as "LAW SCHOOL at cambridge" and so on. on april fool's day, all applicants (and their pet beagles if the applicant so chooses) goes to their local ballot box where they write on a piece of paper their lsat score, their gpa, their undergraduate institution, their race, and their favorite brady. accompanying this information with be the student's preference ranking of LAW SCHOOL satellite campuses (simply putting LAW SCHOOL will result in ten demerits and a jettisoning to LAW SCHOOL at grand forks). all of this information will be sent into a giant computer which will use a simple formula to calculate applicant preference lists for each campus and then that giant computer will spit out each school's list of attending students for the following year using the stable marriage algorithm. think about the expediency! geez whiz, this even makes metaphorical sense!
preliminary studies show that this process gives 95 out of 100 students the same law school they would have chosen otherwise (because all law schools just care about is lsat/gpa, and all students care about is the LAW SCHOOL campus rankings), and those five students will make their sacrifice for the greater good, giving a satisfactory process with a substantial discount in trees, time, and heartache saved. think about the multifactor productivity! 3.6/169 won't have to fret any longer about impossibilities. what about free will? no, you're just hungry. it's not a supermarket, but it never was. or it was, but don't fool yourself into thinking you could've bought something. so it looks like an asylum? so what? i read my ayn rand, stupid bi—get your hands off me!
i don't want to go out making love in a forest with my golden-haired, uber-rational love-vixen, up to my nose in ego. forget it—i want to be dragged out kicking and screaming.
Posted by foxes in misc at 06:02 PM | riffraff (62) | trackback (1226)
February 11, 2005
where's the game in life behind the game behind the game
word to ut austin school of law. i'm looking out for their he got game big state-style recruiting visit. stop by the assistant professor's dorm room? whatever you say! naw baby—call me jesus!
in my acceptance letter to texas, monica ingram writes:
Our faculty is consistently ranked as one of the best teaching faculties in the country, and our students are genuinely pleased with their experience here. These factors, along with our outstanding library, impressive physical facilities, and reasonable tuition make Texas one of the premier law schools in the nation.
foxes would like to get better acquainted with texas' "impressive physical facilities". i've been so desolate lately that i've begun to understand the siren song of the manatee. hey hey! keep your flippers off the keyboard! excuse me miss fufu, we ain't goin' out with you lookin' like that! sheesh, put on your face!
Posted by foxes in acceptances at 07:47 PM | riffraff (201) | trackback (997)
February 10, 2005
cali-forni-hates-me
After reviewing thoroughly your application for admission to Boalt Hall, the Admissions Committee has decided, with regret, not to offer you a place in the Class of 2008.
apparently, california hates me. stanford uses a similar wording except they "sincerely regret". whew! hey stanford admissions peeps! "well qualified" should be hyphenated! ohhh, snap!
in my mind, the meaning of 'regret' encompasses a degree of self-reproach—a desire to undo what's been done. berkeley takes this approach by somewhat classlessly inviting me to apply as a transfer applicant at the end of my first year. honey, if you feel that bad about it just shout me a holla! shoot, i don't have any pride!
surely dictionary.com's definition of 'regret' will show its prescience.
n : sadness associated with some wrong done or some disappointment; "he drank to drown his sorrows"; "he wrote a note expressing his regret"; "to his rue, the error cost him the game" [syn: sorrow, rue, ruefulness] v 1: feel remorse for; feel sorry for; be contrite about [syn: repent, rue] 2: feel sad about the loss or absence of 3: decline formally or politely; "I regret I can't come to the party" 4: be sorry; "I regret to say that you did not gain admission to Harvard"
Posted by foxes in rejections at 11:57 AM | riffraff (178) | trackback (1431)
February 09, 2005
shootin' some bball outside of the law school
anything stuck in my teeth?
playing for the famed (read: infamous) skaxeyli intramural basketball squad the past two years, i was among the tallest players. i've kicked this season off with a 1-1 start on team white chocolate where i am the shortest player, but already one win away from the total number of wins accumulated over a career with team skaxeyli. in tonight's action, i totalled 8 points, 4 rebounds, 1 steal, 1 assist, and 1 physical altercation in a 30 to 48 drubbing.
in an effort to recruit me for their law school basketball squad, the university of michigan law school has offered me an enticing $5k/yr, which is just enough to cover my annual expenses on contraceptives. michael phelps will have a hard time winning this gold medal. shazzam!
Posted by foxes in correspondences at 10:17 PM | riffraff (62) | trackback (1131)
February 08, 2005
foxes tour diary pt 3
2/4/2005—old friends are coming back to you
chicago's marina towers are a wilco fan's mecca. i walked around it seven times before i built up the chutzpah to photograph it. jeff tweedy ended up showing remarkable prescience by singing, "i've been hiding out in the big city blinking / what was i thinking when i let go of you."
the night before, i ate a fortune cookie that read, "old friends are coming back to you." now, who am i to argue with the chinese and their thousand year history of prognostication? i smiled and braced myself for the worst.
------
apparently, the university of chicago's law building was designed specifically with function in mind (at the expense of aesthetics). one building houses the entirety of the law school including all classrooms, the library, professors' offices, etc. unique among law schools i have visited, professors' offices are actually inside of the stacks. i imagine the arrangement is something akin to eating a sandwich while on the pot.
coincidentally, in the green lounge—the hub of activity, the facilitator of collaboration—i bumped into a girl i haven't spoken with since junior high. now a law student, she couldn't stop espousing the virtues of chicago law. she brought me to her property class presided over by professor r.h. helmholz—aka chicago's kingsfield, aka the hammer. unfortunately, he didn't reduce anyone to tears, but, quite clearly, chicago is the place for me.
afterwards, i sat and waited for an old friend to come back to me.
------
in the evening, i watched the university of chicago basketball team destroy brandeis. i spent most of the game staring blankly ahead of me, but at times i wanted to cry and crawl into a corner, which i actually did at one point. maybe it's the difference between chicago and northwestern. maybe i shouldn't have... but whatever. could the chinese possibly be both right and wrong? is such the nature of truth/fortune/life? in this situation, i imagine milan kundera, jumping at the chance to point out the effortlessness of cialis and its contemporaries. while i've never maintained a 36-hour erection, i can appreciate that such an experience could drastically change my worldview.
i'm reminded of the protagonist in chungking express who, when faced with heartbreak, goes out and runs to the point of exhaustion so he has no tears left with which to cry. well i paced the staircase of my mind without breaking a sweat only to find that it was shaped like a mobius strip.
geez, i just got my second wind. maybe the next time around will be different.
Posted by foxes in chicago tour diary at 09:01 AM | riffraff (137) | trackback (1254)
February 07, 2005
foxes tour diary pt 2
2/3/2005—l'esprit d'escalier
my visit to northwestern was fortunate enough to coincide with a talk given by randy barnett of boston university school of law who happened to be discussing a recent case he had argued in front of the supreme court. he told the crowd that, after making his oral arguments, he thought for weeks about what he should have said but didn't. the french have a word for it, he said—l'esprit d'escalier. the regret of afterthought and the consequent unending staircase tread.
while i understand that most of foxes' visitors keep coming back for his erudite prose, i realize that there is a select portion of my fans who mainly value the straight dish. in respect of those yahoos, i'll say this: my interviewer was not a beautiful woman, in fact she—was a man. we exchanged niceties. he asked me, "why northwestern?" and the ubiquitous, "why law?" unfortunately, i didn't prepare an answer to either question so he pulled down my pants and spanked me with a plastic toy shovel.
other questions were, "described a time you failed" and "how's my tie?" but then, out of nowhere, i ripped the interview from out of his clutches by describing my concussion in excruciatingly gory detail, after which i began asking myself questions that i then answered with questions.
somewhere near the end, i spaced out completely—mostly to think about the likelihood of a law school romance with an eight year age differential. in this sense, i appreciate experience in the same way as northwestern law. i like a girl that's been around the block.
-----
that evening i placed 5th in a chess tournament and didn't think about my interview at all. after all, there's no mental recursion when you don't really care. it's not so much about "getting it right" as it is "the epic, untenable, irrepairable consequences of wrong action" that usually stabs me in the gut. and when northwestern is somewhere around 65th on my list, it resides some place down after the spaghetti sauce and the artichoke dip. no, this time around, the only pangs in my gut resulted from the lack of foodstuffs.
i ate some deep dish and kept on whistling.
(photo credit: j. becker)
Posted by foxes in chicago tour diary at 05:15 PM | riffraff (165) | trackback (2902)
February 06, 2005
foxes tour diary pt 1
2/2/2005—putting my best foot forward
heraclitus observed that you can never put your foot in the same river twice. it's the same pheonomena that led siddhartha to point out that time is an illusion. because, while the river moves, it's also still. well, chicago is in the same place that i left it, but it definitely flowed by fast, leaving behind dead mussels and rotten jellyfish in the glistening white foam of its wake. i tried to scrape the brown crud off of the bottom of my feet before i double dipped—fresh like a newborn babe.
i typically read tour diaries of rock stars—such as myself—looking for more than they are willing to offer. after all, a diary is personal but an idol is an idol and surely untouchable. foxes asks you to worship him not for his pristine hands and dainty feet, but for his dirty fingernails and mud up to his elbows. if you're willing, i welcome you to the infinite regress of my inner soul.
i determined to keep a journal of my activities after i veered off of that fateful jump flush onto my rugged cheekbones and woke up remembering nothing. it's the black black blackness that scares me, and i'm not talking about the red line past cermak-chinatown.
anyway, how can we determine the nature of change if our memories aren't persistent? i'd like to cry myself to sleep if i can only remember why. fortunately, arriving in chicago, i did notice all of the ceiling fixtures, the light they cast, and the shadows standing plaintively in the corners.
i slept soundly and woke up with a crick in my neck. i decided then to eschew documentation for interpretation, physical evidence for impressionistic nonsense. are you embarassed? if so, then just think about me—choosing between chicago and northwestern. oops, i wet myself.
(photo credit: m. escalon)
Posted by foxes in chicago tour diary at 11:09 PM | riffraff (241) | trackback (963)
mailbag 2/6/2005
foxes sends a big thank you to his friend euphrates for his pithy one post offering during my five day tarriance in chicago. we're going to michigan together, ok?
i'm sending this post out to those of you who incessently hit refresh on foxes.bluespot.org even while the sexual lightning paul mccartney cajoles the super bowl crowd into a raucous sing-along. i know, i know—you just can't get enough.
hey foxes. my condolences on both stanford and the fulbright. but...
i say forget them! when you get into chicago you and i can crank call stanford's admissions office over and over and over again until they break down and fall into a fit of hysterical tears.
have a good flight to chicago and maybe your northwestern interviewer will be beautiful.
Posted by foxes in mailbag at 08:31 PM | riffraff (235) | trackback (984)
February 04, 2005
a river runs through it
behind this bright smile, a heart is breaking.
first of all, here at foxes we aim to please. but whom? our devoted and cult-like readership? our parents? the man? some might call this the definitive human dilemma. and secondly, we don't shy away from the big questions. the bigger the better. the meaning of life? well, in the words of kristin dunst, bring it on!
now, i can see only two methods for answering the questions that have been posed.
ask yourself, either wwjd (what would jennifer do)? or wwad (what would angelina do)?
you future law students out there say, "but, euphrates, must life be this way, the seducer or the judge, either/or?"
and the river murmurs, the only way out is love.
Posted by foxes in guest blogger: euphrates at 12:28 PM | riffraff (193) | trackback (1442)
February 02, 2005
foxes for now featuring euphrates
in light of the stunning success of bronc-combo's guest blogging stint, foxes has recruited euphrates—aka the fertile crescent, aka the cradle of civilization—to guest blog while foxes sojourns in chicago for the remainder of the week.
fortunately for you, euphrates is seriously bored, maintaing obligations to only his sat-prep kids, his forty year old sugar momma, and this very blog. endorsing euphrates in a personal correspondence, siddhartha wrote, "jim, from this river i done learned 'bout the jee-had."
listen closely to the river.
Posted by foxes in guest blogger: euphrates at 12:08 AM | riffraff (198) | trackback (1510)
February 01, 2005
ce n'est pas un rejet
putting the real in surreal.
already a long week and it's only tuesday. rejected at stanford—that's right. also, rejected for the fulbright. to top it off, i got a concussion while snowboarding in a terrain park called "the learning garden".
i'm going to recuperate by heading to chicago tomorrow until sunday. hopefully, i'll get to visit all of the landmarks from my last windy city romance—the beach, orange, the backseat of a honda civic... in this situation, it's probably not out of line to quote degas who wrote, "girls are preeeetty."
even magritte wouldn't have the huevos to solider on amidst such unknowable mystery. got some dirt on my shoulder; could you brush it off for me?
Posted by foxes in rejections at 09:28 PM | riffraff (232) | trackback (1012)
mailbag, 1/30/2005
a big thanks to bronc-combo for filling in with his calculated inanity. there's nothing like coming home and feeling wanted. a faithful reader writes:
Bring foxes back. I don't like the new guy.
well i'm back. since i didn't post on sunday, i figured i'd throw one in the mailbag. i sent danielle from georgetown law an email, and she was gracious enough to reply with the following lengthy message. for me, it definitely made me stop and take notice of a school that i had pretty much tossed out of the window because of the precipitous decline of their basketball program. now, i may drop by for a visit (and a booty call). shush!
Hi Foxes-
Once again, I want to congratulate you on you acceptance to georgetown. This is a very exciting time and it sounds like you have fantastic schools to choose from. Im so happy to be able to share by experiences with you
In regards to your first question, I also went to ---- for undergrad. I graduated in 2004 and I absolutely loved it. However, at times I also felt that the school was very big and you had to fend for yourself. I can assure that GULC size does not compare at all to [our shared undergraduate institution]. First, law school in general is more like high school in the respect that all your classes are in one building- you come to recognize student and professor faces very quickly. You see the same people in the cafe and getting coffee and there is a real sense of community. Also, your first year you are broken down into sections- each section with about 100 students. This may still seem large, but in law school student participation and discussion is so integral to the teaching method that your section seems small. You very quickly come to know everyone by name. As for the professors, you form a relationship with them by virtue of them calling on you in class. Also at the end of class, students stay to ask professors questions and i feel like students attend office hours more regularly than in undergrad. Most first year professors teach one class a semester and so they take a serious interest in getting to know the students. Also, in terms of career services, they constantly send us emails on interview opportunities. They make us meet with them to thoroughly go over resumes and cover-letters. THey are extremely active and really guide us through the whole process. It is not like [our shared undergraduate institution] where if you do not intiate the visit to the career center, no one will contact you. Here each student is assigned a counsel who continually keeps in contact with us. Lastly i really think going to a relatively large law school is important. First, as with [our shared undergraduate institution], once you find some friends school begins to feel extremely small. I like that there are so many choices at Gtown- in terms of people, teachers, professors. Since georgetown is a great school in a great area I think it attracts a great student body and an amazing facility.
In terms of Washington DC, I think it is a great city to move to after 4 years in [the city of our shared undergraduate institution]. I grew up right outside NYC and I like washington because it is a little slower paced, but yet has a similar culture- great resturants, museums, bars, clubs, shopping, etc. Also there is a terrific political energy. And most importantly it is a really young city, filled with people in their 20's. Its very easy to meet peopel and its very easy to get around. There are so many different great areas to live and go out in- georgetown, dupoint circle, adams morgan, etc. City definitely doesnt close down early- 3am they stop serving alcohol and my favorite coffee shop is open till 5am. People in DC definitely are looking to have a good time at night- and especially georgetwon students. I think we are able to find a good balance here of work and socializing. The weather is sooooo mild- comparing it to [the city of our shared undergraduate institution] it is like the tropics. THe coldest its been so far is maybe 30 degrees- and that kind of weather just started.
I think my favorite part of going to GULC is that i feel like im getting a really well rounded experience. Im at a top school, but yet since im in a great city I am still able to have a life outside school. I can honestly say that I have never found class so interesting- the professors are incredible and the students are also very impressive. In terms of other schools, all i can say is personally I wanted a school that was a lot warmer than [our shared undergraduate institution] (i was done with the snow) and i wanted a school in a lively city.
I hope this helps you and please email me for anything else you might be curious about. Im sure its freezing up at school right now so try to stay warm and enjoy the rest of your semester.
Good Luck,
danielle
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